The integration of male and female

There was a time in my tantric journey when I realized how important it is to understand and integrate male and female polarity. Even if we are in a male or female body, we all have male and female energies within us. Often, these energies are not very balanced internally and for that reason we don't feel whole. This leads us to expect anxiously from others, especially our partner, the 'absent' qualities of ourselves, in the hope of obtaining some integrity. As a result, our relationships can be contaminated by insecurity, possessiveness and immaturity, as our search for fulfillment is directed towards an external feminine or external masculine, the “other half”.

At the same time, we have distorted ideas of what it means for male and female energy. Society's conditioned perception of what it means to be female is based mainly on the appearance and tortuous process of many women trying to always look perfect. High heels, sexy lingerie, perfect hair, full makeup, tight dresses looking for men's external desire to validate that it is sufficiently in its feminine splendor.

Tantra, however, taught me that being in my feminine is much more than I look. It is about having an open heart and feeling radiant from the inside out. So many women try to look more feminine by changing their hair, their body (with diet or surgery), their shoes and dresses and even their tone of voice or attitudes. Is not it! Being in your feminine is living with an open heart. The act of making tantric love will teach you that more than any other practice. When I say love, I don't mean just in the bedroom, because when you are in your true feminine essence, you are making love with your whole life! Female sexual energy flows from the heart. The heart is your place of power, your positive pole.

However, the male sexual energy flows from the man's sexual center, from his lingam. This is your place of power, your positive pole, which means that your first activation takes place in the pelvis. To be in your masculine, for many, means to "see" in bed or to be successful, to have money and respect, to be the provider. A deeper part of the polarity for a man is when he can involve the feminine with his penetrating energy and understand that being in his masculine power as a man does not only mean to penetrate the world, but also to penetrate a woman with love, receiving from his heart and channeling it through your penis.

As women, it is crucial that, in order to feel aroused throughout the body and ready for penetration, our heart chakra must be aroused. Once we are caressed slowly, once our bodies, our breasts, our hearts are activated, our Yoni opens naturally. Unlike the overly masculine approaches to sexuality that we see so often (genital orgasm, pornography, abstinence or celibacy) , the act of tantric love is much more feminine and can be described as a deep surrender to the mystery.

In fact, there is really no difference between the feminine and sexuality itself. A female body is a round, fluid and wavy ocean of sexual energy that wants to move in an undirected and exploratory way. The feminine principle, like tantric lovemaking, is a gateway to the body. We don't need to achieve a result, please people or get something from someone; rather, we need to realize that sexuality is linked to our hearts and souls. We feel that when we enter someone or someone enters us, that is a gateway to the inner mysteries of the Divine. With this more conscious and devotional attitude to the act of making love that Tantra invites, the penetrating masculine principle, when directed with presence, respect and conscience, claims and takes away the feminine in deep surrender.

In our retreats, as well as in the online course we are preparing in this quarantine, you can learn some practices to make the male energy flow from the genitals to the heart and the female energy from the heart to the genitals so that polarity and tantric love flow naturally. !

Any doubts I am available.

With love, Veronica (Sonala)