Acceptance

We have so much to grow when it comes to acceptance, right?

We spent our childhood being taught that we must compete all the time, we have to be “the best at this, the best at that”. We are subjected to comparisons, they tell us that “so and so is smarter, smarter, cooler, more fun, faster, it makes everything better”.

And we are molding ourselves, believing that to be loved we need to be in a certain pattern. He spends his life running to meet the expectations of others and ends up losing himself completely, becoming beings full of social masks, plastered, without any spontaneity. And as we cannot reach all the desired standards, we cannot even accept ourselves. Suffering, charging us, doing a huge harm to ourselves, we get into gear and become lifeless beings, just surviving. And this model is being reproduced through the education of our descendants. Family, school, society, all contributing to the suppression of what we really are.

How can we accept the other, if most of us are not able to accept ourselves? We judge others, armed with our ways of reading the world, according to all the programs we receive.

Our love is extremely conditioned. If the other does not live up to our expectations, we do not love him, judge him, condemn him, repress him and exclude him.

It is very common to see in current policy discussions, for example, hate on the one hand trying to combat hate on the other side. What makes us think that the other will hear a point of view opposite to his, and analyze whether it makes sense, whether he is being treated with hatred, suffering harsh criticism and being branded as an imbecile. He doesn't even listen. Would you listen?

As we were charged for perfection, we believe that the other, to receive our love, must fit our standard of perfect. And nothing needs to be like that. Of course, nobody has to live with someone who has nothing to do with you. But let the other one be as he can be. Stay away if you want. But it is not cool to impose on someone who is as we hope, in a way that we would be able to love him. That is within our vision of right, good, adequate, which is nothing more than our point of view, and that's it.

What has to change is our need to change the other. Changing the other is something you can't do. Change is internal. You only change yourself. It is possible that the other feels inspired to change by their attitudes, but the choice is theirs. Talking, showing your point of view lovingly, bringing new ideas, possibilities for change and growth are valid. But if it doesn't make any sense to the person, why impose even more things than have been imposed on them a lifetime? It would be to rape her further.

It is up to each one to choose this path, how he wants to be and live, what brings him joy and peace, tranquility, peace, what amuses him, what nourishes him, what makes him feel alive, even if they are not choices conscious but programmed. If the person feels that good, that's fine. We can choose who we want to relate to in intimacy.

Wanting to change the other on a pulse is super violence. Each one is in a moment of life, in a personal search, and this needs to be respected. Let's bring awareness to our lives and let each one be as he or she can be now. May we be able to exercise a non-judgmental look even at ourselves and truly see the divine that exists in all beings, with a deep acceptance of who we are and how we are at that moment. No charges and malicious attitudes, but with sobriety and love.

It is worth reflecting and observing yourself in relation to judgments about yourself and others. Realizing when you are doing this is a good step. And step by step, we grow and make room for acceptance. Let's go?