Premature Ejaculation

It is very common for a man to suffer from premature ejaculation for a long time in his life and only seek help when he can no longer bear the anguish of experiencing it.

Culturally, there is a very heavy burden on men at many stages of life. Since childhood, speeches that can be quite repressive and destructive are already beginning to be instilled, and that continue to be reinforced over the years, and often continue to be transmitted from generation to generation: “man does not cry”, “you are not a man, no ?”, “this is not a man thing”, “you have to be a stud”, “you will get all the girls on the street”, “you have to want them all”, “you cannot deny fire”, “you have to always be ready to sex", "you have to have a big dick", "you have to take care of the woman", "you have to spend a long time in sexual intercourse before ejaculating"... Among so many others, these lines echo, together with beliefs generated by watching pornography, traumatic memories, feelings of rejection, insecurities, fears, and often generate enormous anxiety, largely responsible for many cases of premature ejaculation.

It is very important, if it is an issue related to anxiety, that it is worked in conjunction with body therapy. It is recommended that the man has a follow-up with psychotherapy sessions to work the anxiety along with the dysfunction. Usually the problem is not isolated. There are many emotional issues that need to be worked on as well, and there is a self-responsibility of the person that needs to be highlighted: commitment to the process, surrendering and allowing yourself to experience techniques that help you learn to maintain the state of presence during sexual intercourse and in life, get out of automatic, learn to breathe, acquire healthy habits, take care of emotional health, perceive and transmute destructive, castrating beliefs, change the look on yourself, self-acceptance, self-love, dissolution of traumatic memories.

There are different degrees and particularities in relation to premature ejaculation. There are situations in which, just thinking about an erotic scene, imagining being touched, the man ejaculates. Often, this ejaculation happens without any connection to pleasure, there is no orgasm. It is a release of tension, and after this ejaculation, after a few minutes, the man is able to experience a lasting sexual relationship before a second ejaculation.

There are cases where the man gets used to provoking one or two quick ejaculations, so that he feels ready to have a sexual relationship with his partner. Some get used to it and live well that way, others feel a lot of anguish and seek help so they don't need that discharge that precedes sexual intercourse.

There are also such severe cases in which the man cannot have a sexual life, ejaculation is so premature that before starting the relationship he ejaculates, and this is so tormenting that he cannot continue.

The model of sex disseminated by the pornographic industry contributes to many men not being able to accept themselves, to believe that they have an obligation to act according to this booklet, to disconnect from sex, to think about things totally outside of what they are experiencing during the sexual act so that they can not ejaculate quickly and end up harming their own pleasure in a gigantic way, neglecting the relationship with the partner, to correspond to this sexual standard that they believe to be adequate.

Many times, the man comes to one of my services, seeking to solve a premature ejaculation issue, and ends up discovering that he doesn't actually have it. He's only conditioned his body since he started to masturbate, to ejaculate quickly. When a man stimulates his body for the sole purpose of ejaculating quickly, he ends up teaching the body that this is how it should happen. And when experiencing a tantric massage session, with subtle and lasting touches, he realizes that he doesn't actually have premature ejaculation, he just programmed his body to ejaculate quickly.

The Sensitive Massage is very important in these cases, before any genital maneuver, because it is a massage that will bring to the body an extra sensorial experience, an extra sensorial perception. If you skip this step, the person can feel like it's masturbation, and doesn't enter that extra sensory potential. It is a basic massage, opening for the body to begin to feel.

With commitment, surrender to the process, help from psychotherapy and body therapy, it is very possible to solve this issue that greatly harms sexual health and generates unpleasant consequences in other areas of life. Tantric massage is a powerful tool to assist in this process and has contributed significantly to the resolution of this and other sexual dysfunctions.

Accepting, admitting, recognizing that it harms life in a very big way are the first steps to start treating premature ejaculation. Seeing a urologist, taking the necessary tests, making sure it's not related to a physical issue and, from there, allowing yourself to seek therapeutic help and committing to the process can make all the difference in solving the problem. problem and vastly improve the quality of life of men who suffer from this dysfunction.