BEHIND THE VEIL OF RELATIONSHIP

Tantra embraces many practices ranging from breathing, meditation, touching and body access for you to develop and reach more fullness and truth with yourself and everything around you in practical life.

We know that relational issues are very much in demand in our practical universe. Father, mother, brothers, partners, friends, co-workers, people who circulate in our daily lives in general. This whole mosaic comprises a good portion of our energy when we need to manage so many energies together with ours and manage so many characters besides our own.

One of the sensational practices that compete to reveal the extent to which our wounded child still interferes in relational issues is speech, communication. When we don't say what we want, we delegate to the other person to guess what happens inside us, like a baby who cries, and we need to understand if this cry is demanding a diaper change, feeding, sleep, a label that may be itching the skin.

It is a great challenge to understand the communication of those who do not yet have the speech process. But when we grow up, we have this ability and whatever we use, we know within a certain process to communicate our feelings, ideas, emotions, actions, and finally what can actually be good or not for us.

There is an extremely interesting tool that I learned in training with an international Tantra group that focused on ancient Templar arts and that made me understand the development of a totally different relationship. This tool is called RBDSM. And no, no, and nothing that refers to any acronym that designates any set of sexual practices.

Familiarizing ourselves with the acronym, the name means R(relationship), B(boundaries), D(desires), S(sexual healing) and M(meaning). In a translation to our good old Portuguese, the sequence translates into: relationship, limits, desires, sexual health and meaning.

But how do I use it in my communication or my relationship Sasha, you ask me. And here's a beautiful example: you know someone you're interested in at someone level to relate to, and because you don't know whether or not this person is available to you, you decide to open your interest to them and more importantly, decide that this Interest must be placed as a bridge where your truth and that of the person are visible from the start so that this relationship, whichever path you follow, is established from the beginning in the most open, clean and real way possible.

So you start a dialogue in which the RBDSM is the starting point that guides the conversation, something like: “My name is such, at the moment I have not been in a serious relationship for two years, but I have some informal sex with some people in my life. I like relationships where my freedom is an agenda, but if something is deep between us I will relate sexually and effectively only with you, but I could not bear the fact that you do not start from the same premise. My desires here are complete, I would like a person to whom I can share experience and mature in a relationship, but if we are not on the same wavelength over time I can let go and look for what I want elsewhere. I have had episodes of HVP in my life, but they were treated magically and are under control and I have never had any situation in which this factor has been an impediment in my sexual relations, I even use condoms to take better care of my health. sexual, less in a longer relationship to which I prefer to establish the trust of having a relationship only with each other. Being with you means that I can better develop my affective life and open myself to a new relationship.”

On the other hand, the other person has complete freedom to give back in a sincere and argumentative way so that a true link is established from the beginning through private speeches involving relational aspects, about the limits that may or may not have this relationship if it is developed independently about the format, about your desires, about your sexual health and about the meaning that this relationship can have for her, what she really wants in being there with you.

In this dynamic work, you will share with your partner about your real intentions within this interaction, giving the counterpart complete freedom in your feedback, following the order of BDSM, you will talk and open in a natural and sincere way. This practice creates a bond of trust, truth and maturity first with yourself and your real intentions in that interaction whatever the depth, then with the other person making room for them to be truly true to their intentions.

Tantra is not just about direct intervention to the physical aspect, but as a behavioral philosophy that aims at your wholeness, freedom and truth, it supports practices that aim for you to actually be anywhere you intend to be.