Tantric sex: how to melt your ego in forty minutes

{The 'feminine' part of the text is here, written by Alexandra, my partner, about our experience with tantric sex}

Tantra changes life - but only for those who practice. It is not enough to take the course if you do not practice, it is very important to know this.

My account, although I am Alexandra's partner in this adventure, will be a little different from hers, especially the beginning. I did not reach paradise in the first massage. It was only outside that wonderful place, called Comuna Metamorfose, that I had transcendental experiences.

I owe it all to practice, practice and practice!

Not only from tantra, I have been meditating daily for a year and a half.

Alexandra does not always meditate (only when stress stresses) and she is not on the same plateau as me on tantra. I believe that I have reached more advanced plateaus precisely because of the help of meditation. I reached some very high levels with time (the practice), to the point of breaking up my ego and being pure energy.

Will you achieve that too?

I have no idea, each experience is unique and each person has their experiences. Your experiences will certainly be influenced by your beliefs and your worldview.

It started with Delerium, multiorgastic training for couples.

It is not a suruba, as some who have not read Alexandra's text insist on finding, it is exactly the opposite: Delerium is a training to reconnect couples and teach them to deepen the pleasures of sexuality.

First, it is discovered that every human being can enjoy multiple orgasms.

The scene: a house made entirely of wood and glass built on a stone - in a paradisiacal place among the mountains - lively music, fireplace, good food and 30 couples.

Alexandra comments that I look calm (I always seemed calm, even when I'm not).

I doubt that anyone who has never had sexual activity in front of a crowd will be calm at such a time. In any case, the man's concerns are different: “is there really an orgasm without ejaculation or is this a pick thing that promises what it doesn't deliver? Will I get an erection in front of all these people? ”

Tantra is a matriarchal philosophy, which means that women have the preference, so they always receive first. After seeing all that screaming from the women, another thought surfaced: “there is no way for men to have such an experience! This is unfair! ”

When I did the massage at Alexandra, I had the joy of seeing her come like never before. After we finished, the orientation was to leave women alone to “integrate the experience”. Full of pain, caused by ungrateful positions, I left the side, leaned against the glass wall and tried to meditate. Detail: I had been meditating (transcendental meditation) daily for a few months.

When I open my eyes, the curtains that were all closed before are opened, the sunset seemed to be close. The most beautiful thing in the world is to watch the sunset while 30 women join after enjoying like crazy.

Then I saw the scene that changed everything! As we were in the corner, leaning against the wall I had a global view of the room, I saw two more advanced women in tantra having spasms for 5min, 10min, 15min, 20min without anyone touching them, that is to say, they were still having orgasms, while I looked astonished.

Tears came to my eyes, blurring the vision. I thought: “this is it, the return to the body, this is what Nietzsche came to teach us - although he himself was unable to take advantage of the fetters that he took from the rest of humanity; and Osho, they were so different, moreover, Osho enjoyed sex fully and radically, while Nietzsche, as a good European, remained neutered until the end! ”

I wake up to reality when they say it's time for a break. We have lunch and finally it is the turn of men. Intellectually, I am freer than Caligula, one of the things learned in Tantra is that thinking about sex only gets in the way, the real sensation comes with the quiet mind of speaking, of ordinary thinking.

First, the instructor, in the instructor's naked body, teaches women the basic maneuvers of “lingam massage”, in good Portuguese: penis massage. The maneuvers have in common the reverse movements of masturbation, a great cognitive trick to intensify the sensations. There are 6 or 7 maneuvers, easy to do. We stayed in this experience for almost an hour, until my partner couldn't take the movements anymore, which are very tiring the first few times.

As soon as we started I see the guy above me shaking all over as if he's been having an epileptic fit: “this guy can't be enjoying it anymore, this can only be false, I haven't felt anything yet”.

I was embarrassed by my lack of sensation compared to the colleague with his feet very close to my head. Every time he came, while I found it humanly impossible to come without ejaculating, I became more self-conscious. To help, he struggled and his feet hit the ground violently - next to my ears: shovel shovel shovel shovel shovel shovel.

I found out that the friend was in the same room as me. I also found out that 2 of the 4 who were in our room were enjoying themselves dry. It was difficult for both of them to be lying, they had no intention of showing off, to enjoy multiplely was enough for them, I wanted details.

The scandalous friend was already in his fourth participation in the Delerium and gave the tip: Sérgio, when you feel a first spasm, strength to continue that it will not stop there!

“Multiple male orgasms exist” - that's what I thought.

On the second day things have improved, I stuck to the friend's tip and started having the first spasms - still shy. I realized that part of my initial inhibition came from having bad sex experiences with more people in the past. The experiences I had, as cognitive therapists say, had left a negative record of group sex.

It is good to remember that in the case of Delerium, there is nothing about the group, the same environment is shared, or an egregore of mutual support is formed, but each couple focuses exclusively on their partner. Even so, our brains are not so smart to separate past bad experiences from this virtuous egregore, and I could not let go as I would like.

At home, my life really changed from the 4th experience of receiving the massage. It was there, my friends, that I knew this story of walking in the sky that Alexandra spoke. My life has changed forever, I have had incredible experiences in the last year, but that is for another time.